Got your Danish warmed up and your coffee creamed? Good.
I just got wind of the first product from the combined forces of Disney and Apple, and it uses the following ad tag line:
Oh my.
As you may now have guessed it involves the theme parks. Below is the rest of the press release which was accidently posted online at www.iparkland.com last night:
iHate this.
Disney and Apple reinvent the theme park with iPark
WALT DISNEY WORLD ORLANDO--April 1, 2008--The Walt Disney Company along with Apple today introduced iPark, combining three products--a theme park vacation, a widescreen iPod with touch controls, and a breakthrough commerce device with instant debit/credit card billing--into one small and lightweight handheld device.
iPark introduces an entirely new user interface for theme parks based on a large multi-touch display and pioneering new software, letting users control iPark with just their fingers. iPark also ushers in an era of software power and sophistication never before seen in a mobile device, which completely redefines what users can do in a virtual queue.
"iPark is a revolutionary and magical product that is literally light years ahead of any other," said Steve Jobs, Apple's CEO. "We are all born with the need to ride Dumbo--and iPark allows you to do this from anywhere you are with the most revolutionary user interface since the mouse." "With iPark we can finally be rid of those dirty, smelly and expensive to maintain actual theme parks" intones Jay Rasulo, head of Disney's parks division, "not that I ever set foot in them anyway." "I was watching the parade at our Hong Kong park..." said Bob Iger, Disney's CEO.
Battery not included.
iPark is a Revolutionary Mobile Theme Park
iPark is a revolutionary new mobile theme park device that allows users to take virtual rides, see virtual shows and enjoy virtual parades by simply pointing at an icon. iPark syncs all of your billing information from your bank, so that you always pay for every virtual experience instantly. In addition, you can easily construct a favorites list for your most frequently boarded rides, and easily manage your virtual queues.
iPark's pioneering instant E-churro, an industry first, lets users enjoy the scent of a reheated dough stick, decide which dipping sauce they want, then go directly to another virtual outdoor vending cart without delay. This enables users to immediately obtain the snickerdoodle or corn dog that interests them most.
iPark includes a full QWERTY soft keyboard to easily extend your virtual stay. iPark also includes a calendar application that allows users to immediately book their next virtual theme park visit.
iPark is Widescreen
iPark is widescreen with touch controls that lets pin traders "trade" their collections by easily scrolling through entire lists of characters, rides, events and limited editions with just a flick of a finger. Pin artwork is stunningly presented on iPark's large and vibrant display. iPark also features Queue Flow, Apple's amazing way to wait in a virtual line for a virtual ride, for the first time ever.
Better than AMC.
iPark's stunning 3.5-inch widescreen display offers the ultimate way to watch virtual in room promotional videos and endless Disney DVD trailers on a pocketable device, with touch controls for play-pause, chapter forward-backward and volume.
iPark plays the same videos over and over again so you can enjoy Stacey Aswad untill doomsday if you want. The iPark now offers over 350 Stacey Aswad promo shorts, and over 5,000 Disney DVD promotional trailers. iPark also includes Goofy's Maps, featuring Disney's groundbreaking park map service, offering the best maps experience by far on any pocket device. Users can view virtual rest room locations, virtual attraction information and get virtual mis-directions, all from iPark's remarkable and easy-to-use touch interface.
iPark's Advanced Sensors
iPark employs advanced built-in sensors--constantly monitoring your bank balance or credit card limits. iPark's built-in accelerometer detects when the user has rotated the device from portrait to landscape, then automatically changes the contents of the display accordingly, with users immediately seeing the entire width of a itemized billing page, or virtual room service charges in their proper landscape aspect ratio.
"iPark is a miracle, just like me." said Steve Jobs, Apple's CEO. "iPark is the future, um, now." drones Jay Rasulo, head of Disney's parks division. "I was watching the parade at our Hong Kong park..." said Bob Iger, Disney's CEO.
Actual parks to close shortly.
Pricing & Availability
iPark will be available in the US in June 2008, Europe in late 2009, and Asia in 2010, for $1499 (US). This includes a single user, three day "park hopping" virtual visit. Additional virtual visits may be downloaded via iTunes at similar price points.
Got your Danish warmed up and your coffee creamed? Good.
in the 4+ years he's been doing this you'd think he'd be a little more creative with his opening lines. IT's the same line EVERY article....Coffee/Tea and/or a Carb of some sort. _________________
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